How to use this page

Every table below has the same three columns. Read the English column to find the line you need, then copy the Japanese column. The romaji column is there so you can say the line out loud on the phone, or check that a translation app has not changed your meaning.

The Japanese here is teineigo (丁寧語), the ordinary polite style. It is what most parents use with teachers. You will not sound rude, and you will not sound like a business letter. A few lines use slightly more formal endings, which is normal when you are asking for something.

If some of the Japanese terms on this page are new to you, our glossary of Japanese school terms explains them one by one, and how Japanese schools work gives the background: who the homeroom teacher is, what the school year looks like, and who else works in the building.

Ask the school how they want to be contacted

Before you use any template, find out how your school takes messages. This varies a lot. Many schools now use a contact app or web form for absences, some still want a phone call before the first lesson, and some use the paper contact notebook (renrakucho / 連絡帳) carried by a sibling or neighbor. Sending an email to a teacher’s personal address is usually not how it works, and a message sent the wrong way may not be seen at all.

Ask once, at the start, and you will save yourself months of guessing.

Asking for simple Japanese, furigana or English

You are allowed to ask for this, and it is better to ask early than to guess at a handout for a year. The public term for plain, slowed-down Japanese is yasashii nihongo (やさしい日本語). It is an established idea in Japan: the Immigration Services Agency and the Agency for Cultural Affairs publish guidelines on writing in plain Japanese for foreign residents, and many local governments and schools already use it. Asking for it is a normal request, not a favor.

Telling the school your child is absent this morning

This is the message you will need most often, so it is worth having it saved on your phone. Keep it to three parts: who you are, that your child will be absent, and thank you. That is a complete message in Japanese. You do not need an apology paragraph.

The phone version

Here is the whole call. Replace the class and name.

If you are the father, say chichi (父) instead of haha (母). If you would rather not use either, hogosha desu (保護者です), “I am the guardian”, works everywhere. Japanese family name first is normal, but either order is understood.

Giving a reason, or not

Schools ask for a reason mainly so they can track illness spreading through a class and check that a child is safe. In everyday practice, a general reason is accepted. You do not have to describe your family’s situation in detail, and you do not have to give a medical explanation you are not sure about. If a teacher presses for more, it is usually concern rather than suspicion, and you can say you will talk about it at a meeting instead.

If absences are becoming regular, it is worth reading our guide to school refusal in Japan (futoko) alongside these phrases. The Japanese word futoko (不登校) is used by schools as a plain description, not an accusation: in the MEXT survey for the 2024 school year, published in October 2025, 353,970 elementary and junior high students were counted as futoko. Your teacher has almost certainly had this conversation before.

The app or email version

Written messages can be a little more complete than the phone version, because nobody is waiting on the line.

Copy this:
件名：欠席のご連絡（3年2組 田中はな）
いつもお世話になっております。
3年2組の田中はなの母です。
本日は体調がよくないため、お休みさせていただきます。
ご迷惑をおかけしますが、よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Subject: Absence notice (Class 3-2, Tanaka Hana). Thank you as always for your care. This is Tanaka Hana’s mother, class 3-2. She will be absent today as she is not feeling well. Sorry for the trouble, and thank you. Tanaka Yuri (mother of Tanaka Hana, class 3-2).

Our article on how to tell a Japanese school your child is absent has more variations of this one message, including short versions for a contact app with a character limit.

When your child will be away for a while

Daily absence calls become exhausting for everyone, including the child who hears them. Once you know this is not a one-week illness, it usually helps to move to a different arrangement. Most homeroom teachers will agree to this if you propose it clearly, because it also reduces their morning workload.

Three things are worth settling in the first message: how often you will be in contact, how handouts and homework will reach you, and what happens to the things your child has left at school.

Late arrival, early leaving, the nurse’s room and pick-ups

Many children who cannot manage a whole day can manage a part of one. Japanese schools have ordinary words for each of these arrangements, which makes them easier to ask for: chikoku (遅刻, arriving late), sotai (早退, leaving early), and the nurse’s room, hokenshitsu (保健室), where a child can rest without going to class. Time spent in the nurse’s room or another room inside the school is generally counted as attendance, though the details are decided by the school.

Asking for a meeting, a counselor or an interpreter

A meeting is called mendan (面談). Parents can ask for one at any time; you do not have to wait for the scheduled parent-teacher period. A meeting is also where you can bring a translation app, a Japanese-speaking friend, or an interpreter, which makes it a better place than the phone for anything complicated.

The school counselor (sukuru kaunseraa / スクールカウンセラー) is a psychology professional who visits the school on set days. Parents can usually book a session for themselves, without the child present. If you are not sure who else works in the building and what each role does, our page on where to get help lists them, along with services outside the school.

Reporting bullying or trouble

This is the hardest thing to write in a second language, because tone matters and you cannot feel the tone. The way through it is to separate two things that English speakers often combine in one paragraph: facts and what you are asking for. Write the facts flatly, in time order, with dates. Then write your request in one or two sentences. That structure reads as serious and reasonable in Japanese, and it also happens to be what a school needs in order to act.

Bullying is ijime (いじめ). Under the Act on Promotion of Measures to Prevent Bullying (いじめ防止対策推進法, 2013), when a school receives a report that suggests bullying, it is required to check the facts quickly, report the result to the body that runs the school, and support the child who was harmed. The Act also defines a “serious case” (judai jitai / 重大事態), which includes a situation where a child is suspected of having been forced to be absent from school for a considerable period because of bullying, and requires an investigation in those cases. You do not need to quote the law to be taken seriously, but it is useful to know that the duty exists.

The shape of the message

Two registers: not blaming, and being clear

The first set of lines keeps the door open and asks the school to look. The second set states your position plainly. Both are polite Japanese. Use the first for a first message, and the second when a first message has not produced anything, or when the situation is serious. Mixing a few lines from each is normal.

Keeping a record

Records matter more than strong words. Keep one simple document, on paper or on your phone, and add to it the same day: the date and time, who you spoke to, what they said, and what was agreed. After a phone call or a meeting, send a short message that repeats what you understood. It is not a legal move; it is a normal, courteous way to prevent a misunderstanding between two people working in different languages.

Copy this after a call:
本日はお電話をありがとうございました。
確認のため、お話しした内容をまとめます。
・◯◯について、来週中に本人から話を聞いていただく
・結果を、こちらにご連絡いただく
私の理解に間違いがあれば、教えてください。よろしくお願いいたします。

In English: Thank you for the call today. To make sure I understood, here is a summary: you will speak to the children about this next week, and you will let me know the result. Please correct me if I have misunderstood anything.

For what schools, city services and helplines can do when bullying is involved, see our article on bullying in Japanese schools and what parents can do. If your child is in danger right now, call 110 (police) or 119 (ambulance). The 24-hour Children’s SOS Dial (24時間子供SOSダイヤル) is 0120-0-78310, toll-free, in Japanese.

Asking for accommodations

An accommodation is hairyo (配慮), which means consideration or an adjustment. Japanese schools handle these informally most of the time: a seat change or permission to wear ear defenders is usually a conversation with the homeroom teacher, not a formal process. Two things make a request more likely to be agreed: name one specific change rather than a general problem, and offer to try it for a fixed period.

If your child is neurodivergent, or you think they might be, our page on neurodivergent children in Japanese schools covers the support systems that sit behind these requests, including special needs classes and the consultation route through the city.

If the answer is no

A refusal is rarely the end. Often it means the teacher cannot do that exact thing, or is unsure whether they are allowed to. These four questions move the conversation forward without making it a confrontation.

Asking about attendance when your child learns elsewhere

If your child is learning at an education support center, at a free school, or at home with ICT materials, those days can in some cases be recorded as attendance at the school where they are enrolled. This is called shusseki atsukai (出席扱い). A 2019 MEXT notice sets out the conditions, and the decision is made by the principal of the enrolled school, case by case, on the basis of cooperation between the family and the school. Because it is a judgment rather than an automatic right, how you open the conversation matters.

The rules themselves, including what the notice requires and what it does not, are explained on our page about attendance rules and costs. This section only gives you the words. It helps to ask, early, what the school will need from you, rather than starting with a request for a decision.

If you have not chosen a place yet, our pages on education support centers and free schools in Japan explain the difference, including cost and who runs them.

City hall and the board of education: transfers and enrollment

Two different offices handle school paperwork, and knowing which one you are standing in front of saves a trip. The city or ward office (shiyakusho / 市役所, kuyakusho / 区役所) handles your residence record and issues the notice that tells a school to accept your child. The board of education (kyoiku iinkai / 教育委員会), usually the school affairs section (gakumuka / 学務課), handles which school your child is assigned to, requests to attend a different school, and enrollment questions for foreign-national children.

The exact documents differ by municipality, so treat the names below as what to ask for rather than a national rule. In many cities a transfer between public elementary or junior high schools involves a certificate of enrollment (zaigaku shomeisho / 在学証明書) and a textbook certificate (kyokasho kyuyo shomeisho / 教科書給与証明書) from the old school, plus a transfer notice (tennyugaku tsuchisho / 転入学通知書) issued at the city or ward office when you register your new address. Chiba City and Fukuoka City, for example, both set out this sequence on their official pages, and Chiba notes that the textbook certificate is not needed when a child is transferring in from overseas.

Decoding the handouts and messages the school sends

School paper is written in a compressed style with a small set of repeating words. Once you know about thirty of them, most handouts become readable enough to act on. These two tables flip the columns: the Japanese comes first, because you will be reading it rather than writing it.

Words about what you must do

Words about events and daily life

Our glossary of Japanese school and education terms covers the vocabulary that appears in conversations about support, rather than on handouts: futoko, shusseki atsukai, tsukyu, and so on.

How to build a message: subject, greeting, closing, signature

A message to a teacher has a fixed shape. If you follow it, the content in the middle can be plain and short and it will still read correctly. The single most useful habit is to put the class and the child’s name in the subject line, because a homeroom teacher may get thirty messages before the first lesson.

Three small things that make a message read naturally. Write the child’s class as 年 and 組, for example 3年2組 or 1年A組, exactly as it appears on their handouts. Use 本人 (honnin, “the person themselves”) to refer to your own child in a message to school, rather than repeating their name. And you can end almost any request with よろしくお願いいたします, which carries the weight of “thank you for your help with this”.

Seven messages you can copy and send

Each of these is complete. Change the class, the names and the dates, delete anything that does not apply, and send. The English under each one tells you what you are sending, so nothing goes out that you have not read.

1. Absence today

Copy this:
件名：欠席のご連絡（3年2組 田中はな）
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
本日は体調がよくないため、お休みさせていただきます。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: A one-line absence notice. Nothing more is expected.

2. A longer rest, with three requests

Copy this:
件名：しばらくお休みすることのご相談（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
ここ数週間、朝になるとおなかが痛くなり、学校に行くのがつらいようです。本人と話し合い、しばらく休ませることにしました。
つきましては、次の3点をお願いできないでしょうか。
1. こちらからのご連絡は、当面は週に1回（金曜日）にさせていただきたいです。毎朝の連絡が、本人にも家族にも負担になっています。
2. プリントや宿題は、週に1回まとめて受け取りに伺いたいです。ご都合のよい曜日と時間を教えていただけますか。
3. 教室に置いてある荷物を、ほかの子が帰ったあとの時間に取りに伺ってもよろしいでしょうか。
本人の様子が変わりましたら、こちらからご連絡します。
お忙しいところ恐れ入りますが、よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Explains that mornings are hard and that you have decided on a period of rest, then asks for weekly contact instead of daily, a weekly handover of handouts, and a quiet time to collect belongings. It promises to keep the school informed, which is what makes the first request easy to agree to.

3. Asking for a meeting, with the counselor and language support

Copy this:
件名：面談のお願い（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
今後のことについて、一度お時間をいただけないでしょうか。可能であれば、スクールカウンセラーの先生にも同席していただきたいです。
また、私は日本語がまだ十分ではありません。通訳や日本語の支援をお願いできる方法があれば、教えていただけますか。翻訳アプリを使いながらお話しすることもできます。
来週以降で、ご都合のよい日を2、3日教えていただけますと助かります。平日の16時以降が伺いやすいです。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Requests a meeting, asks for the counselor to attend, raises the language question without apology, and offers your own availability so the scheduling takes one message instead of four.

4. Reporting something that happened, without blaming

Copy this:
件名：学校での出来事についてのご相談（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
家で本人から聞いたことを、事実としてお伝えします。
・9月10日（水）昼休み、教室で、同じクラスの数名から「くさい」と言われた。
・9月12日（金）体育の時間、ペアを組むときに一人だけ外された。
・9月16日（火）下校中に、かばんを取られて地面に落とされた。
このあとから、朝になると学校に行きたくないと言うようになり、夜もあまり眠れていません。
誰かを責めたいわけではありません。まず事実を確認していただきたいです。そのうえで、休み時間や体育のペアの決め方について、本人が安心して過ごせるように見直していただけないでしょうか。
確認の結果と今後の対応について、9月30日ごろまでにお知らせいただけますか。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Facts with dates first, then how your child is, then the request, then a date for a reply. To make it firmer, replace the fifth paragraph with: これはいじめにあたると考えています。学校として、事実確認と対応をお願いします。対応の内容は、書面でお知らせください。

5. Asking for accommodations

Copy this:
件名：授業中の配慮のお願い（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
本人は大きな音が苦手で、体育館や音楽の時間に強く疲れてしまうようです。
つぎのことをお願いできないでしょうか。
・音がつらいときに、イヤーマフを使わせていただくこと
・教室がつらいときに、別室や保健室で休ませていただくこと
・当面、宿題の量を1日20分程度に調整していただくこと
すべてが難しい場合は、できるところからで構いません。まず1か月ほど試して、様子を見て、またご相談できればと思います。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Names the difficulty, lists three specific changes, then offers a trial period and a partial yes. The last sentence is what usually gets the reply.

6. Asking about attendance for learning elsewhere

Copy this:
件名：出席の扱いについてのご相談（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
現在、本人は週に3回、◯◯（施設名）に通っています。自宅では、オンライン教材を使って学習しています。
この学習を、指導要録上の出席扱いとしていただけるかどうか、校長先生にご相談したいです。まず、学校として何が必要かを教えていただけますか。必要な書類や、毎月の報告の形式があれば、こちらで用意します。
施設の担当者との連携も、お願いできればと思っています。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Describes what your child is actually doing, asks to consult the principal, and offers to do the paperwork. It asks what is needed rather than demanding a decision, which is the version most likely to get a real conversation.

7. Telling the school you are moving

Copy this:
件名：転校の手続きについて（3年2組 田中はな）
◯◯先生
いつもお世話になっております。3年2組の田中はなの母です。
家庭の都合により、10月末に◯◯市へ引っ越すことになりました。11月から新しい学校に通う予定です。
転校の手続きについて教えていただけますか。在学証明書と教科書給与証明書は、いつ受け取れますか。ほかに必要な書類があれば、あわせて教えていただけますと助かります。
これまで本人を支えていただき、ありがとうございました。
よろしくお願いいたします。
田中 ゆり（3年2組 田中はな 母）

In English: Gives the date, asks for the two certificates by name, and thanks the teacher. Send it as early as you can; many schools ask for several days’ notice before the last day.

Phone calls: the first ten seconds, messages and call-backs

Phone calls are harder than messages because you cannot use a translator in real time. The fix is to decide in advance that the call will be short, and to have the sentences in front of you. Nobody minds a parent reading from a script. If the call becomes complicated, it is fine to stop it and move to writing.

Things worth being careful about

None of these are rules, and none of them are about being a good foreigner. They are patterns that tend to make the next conversation harder, collected from parents who have been through this.

• Recording without saying so. If you want a record of a meeting, it is usually better to ask: Kiroku no tame ni rokuon shite mo yoroshii desu ka (記録のために録音してもよろしいですか). If the answer is no, take notes and send a written summary afterwards, which serves much the same purpose.
• Posting about the school on social media. Naming a school, a teacher or another child in public tends to end the cooperative phase of a conversation immediately, and it can create problems of its own. Keep your record private, and share it with the people who can act.
• Sending messages through other parents. Information passes through several languages and several opinions on the way. Go directly to the homeroom teacher, even if the Japanese is imperfect.
• Writing at 2 am when you are furious. Write it, save it, and read it the next morning before sending. Teachers also read messages outside working hours, and a message that arrives at night often reads harder than you meant.
• Letting a translation app choose your tone. Machine translation can turn a mild English sentence into a blunt Japanese one. Short, simple English gives a safer translation, and the phrases on this page have already been checked.
• Going over the teacher’s head too early. Give the homeroom teacher a real chance first, and say when you are about to involve someone else. Skipping steps without warning makes people defensive.
• Criticizing the teacher in front of your child. Children often feel responsible for the conflict, and some stop telling their parents things in order to prevent it.

What this page does not cover

Frequently asked questions

Sources